happy fourth on the third

"Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don't leave any of yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve to go into unexplored territory." -Alan Alda

I love this quote.  The imagery of not leaving any of ourself safely on shore conjures up the image of a decisive leap, a jump, a decision to do something different - or differently - than we've ever done before.

And that's what makes life exciting.

If I can encourage you to do one thing, it's this - Do whatever you're dreaming. It doesn't have to be big, but to you it will never be small. It's your dream.

You can make a difference.  Even if you feel you're circling the landing strip over and over again and never getting clearance to come on in.  It's in the getting nowhere that character and patience and steadfastness is formed, if only you don't give up.

Never give up.  Always have hope.

Tomorrow we celebrate America's birthday.  This country was formed by boldness; by embarking for a strange place without leaving anyone or anything safely on shore.  That took guts, commitment and resiliency, and a whole lot of not ever giving up.

May you have a wonderful July 4th remembering our heritage, our freedoms, and this great land in which we live.

big ask part two

If you read Friday's post, I said that I would tell you on Monday about my most recent, crazy, out-on-a-limb big ask that I did in response to our 15 Habits challenge a few weeks ago. 

But before that one, here's another small one that worked out in a big way.....

If you're gonna knock, do it loudly

When I first decided I'd like to pursue writing a picture book, I spent some time poking around  networking and reading other picture book authors' blogs to see how they did what they did.

As I was researching, looking and reading, I stumbled across Corey Schwartz's blog.  I say stumbled, but I believe that God directly led me there because the path was rather straight and fast and I didn't do anything spectacular to lead myself to her.

She had a big invitation.

Which married perfectly with my big ask.

Already published, she was stated on her blog that she was looking for someone to collaborate with on her next picture book.  I've already written about this, but I still am blown away by her generosity and awesome spirit, and I knew that I would be crazy not to ask her to let that someone be me.  What did I have to lose?

So I knocked.  Loud.  I made sure she knew who I was and that I was out here and that I wanted to work with her.   She was happy to take me on, we co-authored Goldi Rocks and the Three Bears, Putnam bought it and you can buy it sometime in 2014.  Since then, she's gone on to write more children's books and perhaps she and I will work on another collaboration soon.  Check out her blog here.

Knock where you're not invited...yet

Now, the BIG ask...the one I was talking about earlier.  Well, that one's still an ask-in-progress.  I live next door to the Berenstain's, as in Stan and Jan (you can read about that in this post).  Stan and Jan have both passed away, but their sons Michael and Leo still work in the house and are writing and producing books and continuing the empire.  

I got bold.  I thought now with Jan gone, they might need my some help.

So, I wrote a friendly, professional letter and dropped it in the mail to them (even though it seems odd to snail-mail your neighbor) and offered my services.  I told them of my few credentials but large desire to help out in Bear Country, and let it go at that.

I figured if I never asked, I'd never know.   I have nothing to lose, and quite possibly a lot to gain.

The letter has gone unanswered as of yet.  And that's okay.  Besides thinking they now have a crazy lady for a neighbor, they probably are getting along just fine and can run that kingdom without any help from me.

But if I'd never asked, I'd never know.

And they haven't said yes, but they haven't said no........

I'll wrap up tomorrow with why you should do a big ask if you haven't already.  And if you have, or if you have plans in the making to do so, leave a comment. One random commenter will be chosen to win a free copy of Seth Godin's The Dip . The winner will be announced on Wednesday!

opportunity waits for those who knock

Did you ever think that maybe opportunity was waiting for you to knock on its door?  In his 15 Habits series, Jeff Goins emphasizes two crucial elements to pursuing our God-given gifts and abilities in this world.   They are:                     
 
1. Choose yourself.
2. Make a big ask (filed under "earn patrons").


Let me tell you about a time I did both, and it worked.

When I was a senior in college, the education majors were called to a meeting about student teaching placements. The prof running the meeting told us there was one opportunity for a pair of student teachers to work together in an outdoor education program at a local state park.  My ears perked up. What a cool placement, I thought.  I knew without a doubt I wanted that opportunity, and I wanted it badly. The more he talked about it, the more I wanted it.  The professor told us it would be a lottery drawing of names for those of us who were interested, so after the meeting I grabbed my unsuspecting roomate, made her fill out an entry form along with mine (because hey, she had the car to get us there) and dropped both our names in the basket.

He said he'd be choosing the winners soon.

That wasn't good enough for me. I had to have this placement. 

Every day after that meeting, I made time to stop by the prof's office to let him know how interested my roomate and I were in those outdoor ed spots.  I asked him if he'd chosen the winning students.  "No, not yet" was his reply.  I did this day after day after day.  Around the fifth day, I stopped by as usual, told him (again) how much we wanted to do this, and I'll never forget what he did.  He turned his chair, looked me square in the eye and said, "You know what?  You've been in here every day asking me about this position.  You are the only student who has shown that kind of interest and enthusiasm.  I've just made my decision.  Those spots are yours.  Enjoy."

Sitting here writing this, I still remember the exhilaration I felt as I left his office for the final time that day. 

Now I realize what I'd been doing.

I'd been choosing myself and making a big ask. 

And it worked.

I've recently done another big ask.  I'll tell you about it on Monday.

If you've not done something bold or brazen yet, I encourage you to do so. Make time to do it this weekend.  You must put yourself out there; you have nothing to lose.  And quite possibly a whole lot to gain.

When you've made your big ask, or if you have a big ask you'd like to share, leave a comment below.  One random commenter will be chosen to win a free copy of Seth Godin's The Dip . The winner will be announced on Monday!

Have a great weekend.  And go out on a limb.  I'll see ya there.





why i'm afraid of my own art

I take pictures.  After all that I've learned recently, I should say

I'm a photographer.

But I'm more reluctant to call myself a photographer than a writer.

I have taken thousands of pictures, put some online, but printed and framed just a few.  Once I gave one of my pictures away as a gift but doing that just seemed bold and pretentious (and distracting to me for every time I went to their house...where is it? where is it?).

Even in my own home, if I do print and frame some of my best shots, they stay leaning against a wall or a cabinet somewhere, gathering dust as I just can't bring myself to hang them up.

I noticed this after it happened recently and I just kept moving said unhung, matted and framed photos from room to room, wall to wall, cabinet to cabinet to lean against.   It never dawned on me to actually hang them somewhere.

Why?

Because I'm afraid of what I'll see.  Afraid that I won't like it.  Afraid it won't be good enough. Afraid it won't look like all those gorgeous prints I always long to buy at art shows.  Afraid that looking at my own artwork day after day will only spell

 F-A-I-L-U-R-E.

Fear holds me back.  Fear keeps me prisoner. Fear must be dealt with or it's never going to go away.

I took a step and did things differently today.  I took the prints, dusted off their frames, rearranged some spaces and now they sit on my headboard.  Once they were there, I realized it only took 5 minutes to go from "hide these" to "these look nice here".  It was painless.  But it took me almost a year to get to those 5 minutes.

Fear no more.

Three things I know that you need to know, too.

1. Your work is better than you give yourself credit for.

2. You are always your own worst critic.

3. I'm living proof that it only takes 5 minutes to go from fear to victory.

Find something you made that needs your attention.  Spend time doing whatever you need to so that you can display it proudly, send it off assuredly, or give it away as a gift with honor.

And then come back here and leave a comment telling what those 5 minutes looked like for you. 

I guarantee you're going to like what you see.

they always leave

My mother dropped me off at kindergarten and I didn't think that was very nice of her, but she knew I was ready and would find my way.

Years later she and my dad dropped me off at college and while I couldn't believe they were actually going to leave me there and I cried all the way through my first dinner in the dining hall, they knew I was ready and once again would find my way and be all right. (My mom cried the whole way home Dad later confessed when he heard my dining hall story.)

When my dad walked me down the aisle, I remember feeling shaky and nervous inside, but he knew that together, my new husband and I were ready and would have to navigate our own way through the ins and outs of marriage.  He couldn't do it for me; he could only take me so far and then he had to let go.

When the nurse in the labor and delivery wing didn't even try to stop us and watched as my husband and I took our three-day-old son out of the safety of the hospital and into the precariousness of world, she knew that even though we probably weren't ready, we would figure it out as we went through our days with no sleep and a lot of dirty laundry to do.  She knew she couldn't come with us, and I'm sure she was happy about that. (I wasn't. I would have paid her good money to come live with us for a while.)

And now our 15 Habits of Great Writers challenge has come to an end, and it's as if Jeff has taken all of us by our collective writers' and artists' hands and walked us to the edge of the cliff and told us, "You know what you need to do.  Now go do it.  And you need to jump off this cliff to make it happen."

Gulp.

Thanks, but I'd rather sit on the edge where it feels safe.

On the other hand, if I never jump, I'll never know what it's like to fly on my own.

Jeff did for us what all great leaders and teachers do.  They show us the way, but make us do the work.

For it is, after all, our work.  It's our art, our writing, our creating, our story of who we were meant to be.

No one can do it for us, but we can do it for ourselves.  In fact, we must.

So let's jump on three, shall we?

1, 2, 3.......................................................................

Leave a comment and tell me what that jump looks like for you. Will you be doing something now that you weren't doing before the challenge?

For me, I'll be writing daily.

You?

don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened

Here we are on the final day, Day 15 of the Habits of Great Writers.  This has been a wonderful time of learning, encouragement, and writing.  From reading the comments on the main page , I can tell that I'm not the only one who is sorry to see this challenge end.  It's been like having our own personal writing coach with us each day, pushing us to do better and better.

That's what a great teacher is all about - helping you discover what you already have in you to do, but showing you a way to do it. No magic formula, just steady practice and encouragement and most importantly, helping you push past the "I can't do it" fear.  Jeff has done this for all his participants. 

His last habit was for us writers to be generous, as in giving away our best work for free.  Yep, free.  The more generous the writer, the more endearing it is to those reading.  Makes sense.  And it's the opposite of what you'd expect, so that makes it fun.

He says, "A great writer is selfless. He doesn’t look to his own needs, but finds a way to help others. He’s a servant.  If you’re going to take your writing to the next level — to be truly great — you’re going to have to learn to do the same."

This is a new way of thinking about writing for me, and I like it.  I have no idea what I'm going to do about it yet, but I like it.

It gives me plenty to think about.

And while I'm fairly sure I won't be giving you a trip to Disneyworld or a pony for reading my blog, I'm certain you'll see some changes as I work to include this new habit.

Let me know what you've done or plan to do to be generous, and to give your best work away for free!

amazing

Today we have a party we are hosting.

My youngest graduated from high school a week and a half ago, and it's time to celebrate.

I ran across some pictures this past week while cleaning out a drawer, and found his school pictures from kindergarten, first grade, and some others during his elementary years.  As his sister and I ooh'ed and aah'ed over them, I thought, where did the time go?  Amazing.

When he was about to enter kindergarten, we were in the grocery story one day and as he was sitting in that seat in the cart facing me (he's 6 foot now- how did he ever FIT in that thing?), somewhere near the deli counter I commented to him about how his brother would be going into sixth grade, his sister would be entering fourth, and he would be headed to kindergarten.  Amazing.

He looked up at me with astonishment, reached up and held my chin in his chubby little hands and said to me, "Mommy!  You are going to be all alone!!"

What was causing his fear was causing my joy, and I quickly assured him that Mommy was just over the top fine with this, and I really would be okay.

When I sent him to first grade, we had just moved to our new house (which, if you've been reading, is my old house where I grew up), and I was terrified he wouldn't make it off the bus, up the steps, and to the right classroom without direct guidance by the hand from me.  But I wasn't allowed to go.  And he made it just fine.  Amazing.

Two months from Monday, we will be taking a loaded car down the pike and dropping him off at college.  We'll help him set up his dorm room, make sure he's acclimated, remind him where the dining hall is, and then drive home without him.

Amazing.

Happy graduation party day, Spencer.  Enjoy your day, because it's all about you. We love you with all our hearts and can't wait to see what great things God has in store as you venture out with Him.